A Prideful Heart

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Have you ever noticed how married couples can argue over the silliest things? You know, things that don’t really matter in the scheme of things. Things like:

  • forgetting to recycle the plastic bags, bottles, or newspaper
  • does the toilet paper go under or over
  • what to eat for dinner
  • turning the lights off or setting the thermostat
  • how to fold the towels

None of these things really matter… except when you think it really, really does.

A prideful heart exalts self above all. Is your prideful heart destroying your marriage?

 Silly Arguments

Yeah. So what do you and your husband argue about? Do you find yourself bickering over ridiculous things? I’ll be honest. My husband and I have been guilty of having completely pointless arguments.

Sure, some arguments are valid and even necessary, but day in and day out, it’s those little irritations that can bring a marriage down.

A Prideful Heart

Most arguments begin with a prideful heart. You feel indignant, misunderstood, disrespected, or frustrated. You feel like your spouse has failed to meet your expectations in some way. I mean, after all, you have asked three times nicely for him to turn off the lights when he leaves a room.

The root cause of most arguments is a prideful heart. {Of course, it goes both ways. But for the sake of this article, we’ll be dealing with your heart issues – not your husbands. I have to realize that it’s not my place to change my husband.}

Yes, maybe it is important to you that the recycling goes into a certain bin. Maybe you have asked your husband several times nicely. Is it a failure on his part to show respect for your wishes? Maybe. Or maybe he really just forgets because it’s not important to him. Maybe he has a different preference.

Regardless of his motives, is the ensuing argument worth breaking your husband’s heart, is it worth creating conflict, heated words, or a ruined evening?

In the grand scheme of things does it really matter?

Is your prideful heart putting a wedge in your marriage?

A prideful heart raises it’s ugly head anytime it feels infringed upon. A prideful heart cares more about the action than the person, because a prideful heart exalts self above all.

The Bible says, “Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.” Proverbs 16:18

Just as pride bubbled up in Lucifer’s heart as he desired to be exalted above God, when pride is allowed to grow and prosper in our own hearts we feel entitled to have our way – no matter what. Are you prepared to let pride bring your marriage to it’s knees?

It’s easy early in a relationship to desire to give and love unconditionally, overlooking those things that later grate on our nerves. Married life, with all of it’s ups and downs, tasks, chores and responsibilities, often leaves us feeling defensive and wounded and pride takes over where unconditional love used to fill our hearts.

When you examine your own heart, what do you find? What things could you let go in order to lift up your husband instead?

While it may seem funny when we hear others bicker over small things, in reality… someone gets hurt.

Weird Things Couples Fight About

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SRMXzq3bN_8]

Marriage Advice


  1. Very good advice! Pride always leads to downfall, so thanks for reminding us how important it is to keep our pride in check. I read recently a good question to ask yourself is, “Will this matter in 5 years?” That will definitely help you decide that silly arguments are not worth it!

  2. Thank you so much for the reminder. Yes, so much of the arguing and disagreements come from a prideful heart.

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